Whenever I bump into someone on the street, or try to get a waiter’s attention at a restaurant, I normally start with “sorry.”
It’s a small word, but it causes a lot of controversy. Numerous times in my life I have had complete strangers tell me I shouldn’t say sorry, because people will think I did something wrong, people will blame me for things, and it is a sign of weakness.
What?
All because I said, “Sorry to interrupt, could I get a glass of water?”
To me, it’s the same thing as “excuse me” or “pardon.” But I choose to say "sorry."
There are people who live their life never saying sorry. They are consumed with being right, being without blame, and oozing strength.
While there is nothing inherently wrong with those things, they are dangerous ways to act. They can lead to inflated sense of self, and conceal low self-esteems and bruised egos.
Usually, the people who can’t say sorry are the weakest.
We all have weaknesses, and we have all heard the saying nobody’s perfect. However, for some reason, a lot of us are afraid to show other people that we’re not perfect. We cover up our shortcomings and hide our insecurities, hoping everyone will think we are strong, we are perfect.
Everyone knows you are not perfect. Weakness is not something to be ashamed of. In fact, the Bible talks a lot about the weak.
“I will seek the lost, and I will bring back the strayed, and I will bind up the injured, and I will strengthen the weak, and the fat and the strong I will destroy. I will feed them in justice.” -Ezekiel 34:16 (NLT)
“We are fools for Christ’s sake, but you are wise in Christ. We are weak, but you are strong. You are held in honor, but we in disrepute.” -1 Corinthians 4:10
The Bible doesn’t talk about weakness as a bad thing; instead, the Bible states that there is something to gain in weakness. It is something everyone experiences.
When we are weak, Christ is strong. It is in our weakness that we can recognize Christ’s strength. Moreover, because of our weakness will Christ strengthen us.
We shouldn’t hide our weakness and insecurities with clothes, or cars, or muscle milk. We should unveil our weakness, so that Christ will strengthen us. Then we can actually do something. Instead of being weak, and talking about how strong we are, we should show our weakness, garner the true strength of Christ, and use that strength to help people.
“We who are strong have an obligation to bear with the failings of the weak, and not to please ourselves. Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, to build him up.” –Romans 15:1-2 (NLT)
“To the weak I became weak, that I might win the weak.” -1 Corinthians 9:22
As I said, we are all weak. So what do we do when Christ strengthens us? We don’t flaunt our strength to make us feel good and feed our egos; we use that strength to build up our neighbors. We use our newfound strength to help the people around us.
When we puff out our chests and talk about how strong we are, we can’t connect with the weak. Paul said he became weak to win the weak. We should share our weakness; let people know that we have been there. That’s how you help people, you get on their level. You don’t rub it in their face that they’re weak and that you are strong. You share your similar story, you connect with them. You get down and help them up.
Our weakness helps us understand our problems, God’s strength, and other people. When we’ve hit rock bottom, we have to rely on the strength of God to bring us up. After that experience, we can turn and help others who are at rock bottom.
It’s like what Rocky said when describing why he loves Adrian, “I got gaps. She’s got gaps. We fill each other’s gaps.”
So just like Rocky and Adrian, God will fill our gaps.
Don’t be afraid to show your weaknesses. Let people know, that’s the only way they can help you. They have probably been there too. And when Christ strengthens you, you can turn around and help others who are right where you were.
So don’t be afraid of someone thinking you’re weak for saying “sorry.” That person is probably just afraid you will find out how weak they are.